Today, I’m in a bit of a struggle and it’s been brewing for quite some time. Typically, I do my mid-year reflection over the Christmas break but recent attitudes have proven that now is the time. Proceed with caution…brutal honesty awaits.
1. You’re not on a campus. Get over it and find your way.
This is my first year NOT on a single campus and I’ve struggled with it. I feel like I’m most creative around students and not having a direct classroom is still odd. Yes, my job is to support teachers but at the same time I know that effectiveness comes from connectedness to the realities of the classroom. I never wanted to be so far removed from kids that what I teach becomes more theoretical than practical. There are quite a few moves that I can make to place myself closer to the classroom…starting with getting my rear end on more campuses regardless of the “red tape” in getting there. This…I can fix!
2. The only thing that is holding you back is your ego. #thatisall
I train teachers for a living. There is no reason on earth that I should not be submitting proposals to share at conferences. I got caught up in the “beat down” of completing the proposal instead of focusing on the intended outcome…professional learning. Everyone has a “submission” of sorts to complete. It’s time to get on my “A” game and start a folder to contain them. I have expertise in certain areas and I need to share it.
3. Where has all the math gone?
Going straight “tech-head” sometimes feels like selling my math soul to the devil! I used to write real lessons and now I barely look at math materials. Thankfully, I started tutoring and all of a sudden, I feel alive again! I miss my math classroom. My challenge will be to find the balance between my area of expertise (math edu) and my chosen career path (edtech). As a classroom teacher, I had the best of both worlds. It’s time that I channeled that into what I do now.
4. Be more positive! Stop being annoyed by other people….You just might annoy them too!
I am the first to admit that I can be too negative at times. I’m working on it but I struggle! I wasn’t this way when I was in the classroom however that is no excuse. The world does not have to agree with me and I’m wrong…a lot. It’s time that I started being more giving and less critical. This one is one that I must PUSH with PURPOSE!
5. Stay more connected to conversations that matter to you…(race, gender, poverty)
Sometimes I find myself holding back. I’ll write something and then not post because I didn’t want to be seen as the “angry black woman”. I should’ve posted about the edcamp conversation with a peer about the lack of teachers of color at events. I should’ve continued the conversations with another black edtech about the lack of teachers of color in edtech conversations. Then again, maybe not “self-promoting” is more of a cultural issue and if so…why? What can we do to change it? How can we change it if no one is willing to speak up?
I’ve done some “ok” things this year but I can do better and I will.
The first step to change is acknowledging the necessity to do so.
The second step is owning it.